Miley: “Dad I have something for Tanners bug collection”
my uncle: “that’s great”
Miley: “it’s a bird”
my uncle: “no its not”
They let it go and it flew away just fine, so we’re wondering how she caught it.
she caught another bird.
update: she caught a squirrel today
She is gonna rule the world one day with this power
I asked my italian grandfather if the rough parts of Italy were called the spaghetto and he looked at me with so much shame.
whoever invented cramps is an asshole
ur an 18 year old boy
NOT JUST FEMALES GET CRAMPS WTF I GOT CRAMP IN MY FOOT FROM ALL THE SEX I’VE NOT BEEN HAVING OKAY CRAMPS DONT JUST HAPPEN IN THE LADY POCKET REGION OR WHATEVER
the lady pocket region
My roommate and I are really sick and we look like shit, but we were hungry so we ordered pizza.
But we didn’t want anyone to see us, so we asked them over the phone if we can leave the money on the door and they can just drop off the pizza.
The guy said sure.
So we decided to leave a nice little note
and we hung it above the door bell. I hope they like it!
pizza spelt its own name wrong